What does the Bible say about marriage? Is it a good thing? A bad thing? A new thing? An old thing?
The first place we see the union of two people in marriage is in the first book in the Bible, Genesis chapter 2. Our Creator is also the Creator of marriage.
Genesis 2:18 says,
“The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”Genesis 2:18
God was speaking of Adam, whose only companions were the animals around him. God caused Adam to fall into a deep sleep, took a rib out of him, and used it to create Eve, Adam’s wife.
Marriage can be a beautiful thing, and it can be a not-so-beautiful thing. A lot of that depends on us, and if we allow God to be a part of our union.
Proverbs 18:22 says,
“He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”Proverbs 18:22
Proverbs 12:4 says,
“A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.”Proverbs 12:4
We see that marriage can be great (or difficult)! Our commitment to another person “til death do us part” should never be taken lightly, and the Bible gives us examples and instructions to help us when we are looking for a companion.
For those who are already married, the Bible also gives us guidelines that will help us.
What does the Bible say about marriage to the unmarried person?
First, dating should be done with the intention of finding a soul mate. Sharing our hearts with every person that catches our eyes is a mistake that will cause insecurities and other issues down the road. Dating around for the fun of it is not the way a Christian should approach the opposite sex.
Next, let’s read 2 Corinthians 6:14:
“Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?”2 Corinthians 6:14
Sometimes this scripture hurts! But please trust God that He knows best, and that is why He has instructed us in His Word to not be unequally yoked. A yoke is a harness that goes around the neck of two animals to hold them next to each other for working. (These are used for animals who plow.)
We may feel the stars in our eyes and that heavy attraction to someone we’ve become acquainted with, but if they are not walking the same life that we are, God does not want us to even consider joining them in a commitment that will hold us together for a lifetime.
If we find ourselves interested in someone, and they are living for the Lord, let’s look to the Word to examine if we can have a healthy relationship with that person.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 says,
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Let us re-read the previous scripture passage and replace the word “love” with the name of the one we are considering as a companion. Is he/she patient and kind? Does he/she envy (have jealousy)? Continue through the rest of the passage and see if they are living an example of love.
This alone can forewarn us and help us avoid making a bad decision. It can show us that the one we have our eyes on needs to draw closer to the Lord before they are ready for a relationship.
Once we’ve cleared any areas of concern, let us be open to Godly advice from those who found their forever love. Listening to a pastor or a voice of wisdom can save us many years of heartache.
And now, what does the Bible say about marriage to the married person?
Matthew 19:5-6 and said,
‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”Matthew 19:5-6
Many people think of this scripture in a physical sense, but becoming one flesh with our spouse is building our lives together. It is time for us to leave the unit we were a part of with our parents and become united with our spouse. Our hopes, our dreams, our plans are now one with the one we made a lifetime commitment to.
Ephesians 5:22: Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord.
Ephesians 5:25: Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.
Ephesians 5:22 makes some wives uneasy, but it shouldn’t. When a man is loving his wife the way Christ loved the church, she will have no problem with doing things that please her husband because she loves him.
For the couple that is unequally yoked in marriage, there may be challenges, but God can also walk with us there. He doesn’t want those who aren’t married to join in an unequal bond, but for those who already are, remember 1 Peter 3:1-2, which says:
“Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.”1 Peter 3:1-2
Marriage is a blessing from the Lord, and He wants us to experience it as a blessing, thus giving us guidelines to help us with our “happily ever after.”
If you’re having trouble communicating in your marriage, Equipping Godly Women has Closer Marriage Conversation Cards which can help!
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